Yesterday was my 26th birthday, so that means you’ve officially been my favorite band for exactly half of my life. You were with me as i figured myself out, as i told my friends who i was, as i told my parents, my family. i took your numerous advices (also your mom’s one time, i think you called her during an interview with liz feldman?) about how and when to come out, it has always felt like you guided me in some way. I’m saying all of this to let you know that even before the ts foundation you were helping people all over the world. I’m just a lesbian from rio, brazil and you’ve helped me more than i can express in words in a comment section. Never worry about whether you’re helping enough, you already did. So thank you for everything and i hope you keep helping and healing and guiding for another 13 years, and another 13 after that 💜
So unfortunately when you donate through stores, they take your money and donate it themselves so they can write it off on their taxes. (This is also how Amazon Smile works) So while it’s convenient, it’s keeping those corporations in power by helping their bottom line. It’s best to donate to the org directly whenever possible.
This was a very interesting read, Tegan! My 21st birthday is in a week and I want to donate to the Tegan and Sara Foundation for my birthday. It's become a very important foundation to me and I'm so happy that you and Sara have created this amazing foundation that helps so many.
as a former retail worker, it never got easier asking people to donate to a random cause followed by asking them if they would like to take out a credit card with the store 😂😂😂😂😂
Aug 7, 2022·edited Aug 7, 2022Liked by Tegan and Sara
I think the tegan and sara foundation is great, love what it does for people. I've actually been debating if I should order the "hey I'm just like you" or the "Tegan and Sara foundation" shirt for my first tegan & Sara shirt. Eventually, I'll get both.
I give when I can, a little to TASF, the library, or Lumos, but will never give to people with clipboards. I find the tactics offensive and I don’t trust that the money actually goes to the cause. I remember when I worked at a grocery store and every time they asked us to ask customers for donations, I refused to do it. There is just something so dystopian about asking poor people for donations to help feed poor people.
Aug 8, 2022·edited Aug 8, 2022Liked by Tegan and Sara
Hey Tegan,
I love the ‘depends on the children/animals’ lines! I have strong political views too, or I’m beginning to. I’m the nervous type of person who does the awkward ‘sorry’ a lot (just when I bump into people, or they bump into me 😅), I can’t say I’ve ever seen a lot of people with clipboards though. If I was bombarded with people asking me questions like ‘do you care about children?’ I would just get more nervous and confused. In my opinion the place to have a lengthy discussion about politics is not on the street with a random person I’ve just met!
I actually did a lot of research last year about your foundation cause I chose the two of you as my activists for a school project. I wonder though, does your foundation that specifically supports LGBTQ+ women and girls, also support nonbinary people? Cause, I know things are far from equal between women and men but at least most people Acknowledge that women exist. (Not trying to start an argument or anything, just wondering?).
In terms of worrying people don’t think LGBTQ+ people need support now that we can get married! I get that! Tegan, as you have said time and time again, marriage equality is the FIRST STEP, not the last. When I came out to one of my grandparents as genderfluid they asked me ‘can you get married?’ And I said yes, but in truth, where I live in Australia there are only two options to have on your birth certificate m or f no x, meaning you can’t change your gender marker to be x. Having said that, you can only change from f to m or visa versa if you get some kind of surgery or hormones. That’s not equality. And in terms of the attacks happening all over the world, I’ve seen on yours and Sara’s social media the stuff happening near you. And a few months ago there was a bill someone in the government tried to get passed that meant that religious schools could kick trans kids out of their schools if they wanted to. Everything is far from fucking equal!
Thank you to you and Sara though, for starting the foundation and trying to make the world more equal.
Tegan, if I were asking for donations and you winked at me, I'd GIVE YOU my credit card AND my social security number. Kidding. Kind of. Honestly though, congratulations on the TSF milestone! Hearing the hard work and contributions quantified, even as a reader, feels satisfying and exciting. I'm constantly in awe of how you and Sara accomplish every goal you set and the responsibility you take in doing so. I really hope you guys write a tell on the logistics of running a foundation and band some day. I went down a rabbit hole of 501(c)(3) revenue tax laws and for profit affiliation and have soooo many questions. Also, is the round up an option on the T&S Official Merch page? Should I call Donna?
There are places I avoid now because they always have solicitors at the door. I’ll often enter through the exit or vice versa, depending on where they are stationed, just to avoid them. Or I’ll hover and time it so that I’m walking just behind someone else and use them as a buffer. I just don’t have it in me to say no, and I often don’t want to donate. Rarely because I don’t believe in the cause, but I recently discovered that many charities mismanage their funds (intentionally or not) to the point that some of them are pretty unethical. And that’s why I also stopped donating at the till. I like to do my research before I donate. For this reason, I no longer judge anyone who says no (and boy did I used to. Like, ‘you can’t spare a measly dollar for hungry kids, asshole?’ silently screamed at the patron in front of me in line). Everyone has their reasons, and we should always be curious, not judgemental.
Btw, I definitely would have smelled a scam too, if an organization ‘required’ my credit card info over the phone. Especially since they never left a voicemail. Seems a weird tactic. If they’d left a message you would have called back, I’m sure. It is unusual, so I think you should forgive yourself for that one 💚
I find it awkward when people ask me for money too, like if I don't do it I'm a bad person, but I try to remember that I help and give other ways to causes I care about. I donate monthly to the Tegan and Sara Foundation, I volunteer and foster cats for the Toronto Humane Society, I don't have a car so I feel like I contribute for the environment, idk, I don't have a lot of money either so I do what I can with what I have.
I left my retail job recently because the amount of pressure put on us to sell perfumes and aftershave’s to every customer was awful. Nothing we did was ever good enough, going to work became soul destroying.
When I make the calendars each year, 100% of every toony donated for one is donated to the Tegan and Sara Foundation. I remeber when I gave the check at the Vancouver Con X show. I wanted to give it to you in private and not make a scene as I didn’t want fans to think I was showing off. Jill told me to come up to the front when you started to talk about the TSF because she said you would love it! To say I was shitting myself is an understatement. (The money was part of my inheritance from losing my parents. My mum had told me to donate some of it to an organisation that meant a lot to me so who better than the TSF) I try amd give to local organisations when I can e.g. Pippa’s Army the rescue place we adopted Mo from, Thurrock Mind for mental health. I get so anxious when I see all the clipboards.
Fun fact: We get them knocking on the door as well, did you ever get that? The worst one was when Evamgelical Christians came to the door when I was at work and asked for me by name. When Charlie asked them why they wanted me they replied “we want to invite her to come to us so we can pray over her and wash away her sinful ways!” Like What the actual fuck!
Is it Tiny Kittens HQ? I know they're in Langley, BC so maybe not. But definitely check out their Youtube. (Will this let me link? https://www.youtube.com/c/TinyKittens/videos or /c/TinyKittens/videos if that doesn't work.) They have 24/7 livestreams to watch the cats and kittens they TNR/rescue.
Also, thank you so much for your foundation! It IS available on AmazonSmile, re: the big box store donations, and sometimes PayPal offers to donate with purchases. As much as it may feel like you haven't done enough, you have definitely done so much. I'm in Chicago and I know a local group got funding from you, which is always needed and appreciated. Like you've said, every dollar matters and helps.
That said, I could not imagine giving my credit card info to a random person on the street. I've signed some lists just asking for names, but credit card/bank info is just too much without further security. Even over the phone like you said, that's just not guaranteed. Too much adulting to think about. I said it before: Adulting is hard lol
I also resent being made to feel guilty by others, I'm quite capable of being hard on myself if I think I need to do something different!
I do sympathise with any charities trying to raise extra funds, it can't be easy but begging on the streets, cold calling door to door (always at an inconvenient time!), etc is so indiscriminate that it makes caring people feel guilty and uncaring people, rude!
I try to support several charities regularly so that the money I can afford to give is donated purposefully rather than reacting to the most persistent canvasser!
I do find it hard to walk past homeless/desparate people begging on the street, especially if I'm going to the supermarket. I often ask if i can buy food for them - many not all! - are grateful.
I suppose altruistically, truly selfless giving should cost us something? Going without something in order to give to others, rather than giving what we can spare anyway? Maybe that's a whole different discussion!
Also, giving to others is more than just donating money. Sometimes that's easier than giving up time and energy to help. My mum always says, you can usually find the tme/money to do what you REALLY want to do.
Anyway, keep giving Tegan, in all the different ways that you and Sara already do to help and inspire so many people in different ways. Thanks and please come to the UK!
Tegan, I have so many feelings from this post because I really understand the awkwardness and challenges you describe about asking for money as someone who works/volunteers in the not-for-profits (nfp) sector. The reality is fundraising is a core source of income for nfp and no matter how much we try to diversify our sources of income, we rely on communities to keep us going. I personally love a good peer-to-peer fundraiser where you involve friends/family and multiply your impact.
You have no choice but to develop thicker skin if you're in the nfp space but something even harder is unlearning the shame society drills into us about asking for help. I try and reframe asking for money as an invitation for others to contribute to a cause they likely already care about (maybe you already do this?). It's a chance for them to connect and have conversations about difficult topics. People are extremely busy and it's a tough time for everyone, so prompting them to share resources/wealth is ok but nobody should be guilt tripped into giving. Side note - clipboard/street style fundraising often feels disingenuous/overly aggressive because street solicitors can be contracted so they may not even work for the organisation OR they receive commissions based on the number of signups so...be wary
Hey Tegan I’m in the same boat. I don’t pay enough attention, that I move too fast, that I miss things -> that right there seems to be me sometimes. You say make the change while you wait for your change. How do you know when that’s happened and when will it happen. Seems like waiting is beating me to death. And that credit card thing. Yep. Mines expired and can’t find the new one 🤣. And donations. God I hate asking customers if they would like to donate. We can ask but everyone is struggling, I even had one guest tell me that she just wants to come shop for groceries without having us ask her more money and demanded I tell the manager. But it comes to a time that we all must help each other out right? Thank you both. Love ya!
Yesterday was my 26th birthday, so that means you’ve officially been my favorite band for exactly half of my life. You were with me as i figured myself out, as i told my friends who i was, as i told my parents, my family. i took your numerous advices (also your mom’s one time, i think you called her during an interview with liz feldman?) about how and when to come out, it has always felt like you guided me in some way. I’m saying all of this to let you know that even before the ts foundation you were helping people all over the world. I’m just a lesbian from rio, brazil and you’ve helped me more than i can express in words in a comment section. Never worry about whether you’re helping enough, you already did. So thank you for everything and i hope you keep helping and healing and guiding for another 13 years, and another 13 after that 💜
So unfortunately when you donate through stores, they take your money and donate it themselves so they can write it off on their taxes. (This is also how Amazon Smile works) So while it’s convenient, it’s keeping those corporations in power by helping their bottom line. It’s best to donate to the org directly whenever possible.
This was a very interesting read, Tegan! My 21st birthday is in a week and I want to donate to the Tegan and Sara Foundation for my birthday. It's become a very important foundation to me and I'm so happy that you and Sara have created this amazing foundation that helps so many.
as a former retail worker, it never got easier asking people to donate to a random cause followed by asking them if they would like to take out a credit card with the store 😂😂😂😂😂
I think the tegan and sara foundation is great, love what it does for people. I've actually been debating if I should order the "hey I'm just like you" or the "Tegan and Sara foundation" shirt for my first tegan & Sara shirt. Eventually, I'll get both.
I give when I can, a little to TASF, the library, or Lumos, but will never give to people with clipboards. I find the tactics offensive and I don’t trust that the money actually goes to the cause. I remember when I worked at a grocery store and every time they asked us to ask customers for donations, I refused to do it. There is just something so dystopian about asking poor people for donations to help feed poor people.
Hey Tegan,
I love the ‘depends on the children/animals’ lines! I have strong political views too, or I’m beginning to. I’m the nervous type of person who does the awkward ‘sorry’ a lot (just when I bump into people, or they bump into me 😅), I can’t say I’ve ever seen a lot of people with clipboards though. If I was bombarded with people asking me questions like ‘do you care about children?’ I would just get more nervous and confused. In my opinion the place to have a lengthy discussion about politics is not on the street with a random person I’ve just met!
I actually did a lot of research last year about your foundation cause I chose the two of you as my activists for a school project. I wonder though, does your foundation that specifically supports LGBTQ+ women and girls, also support nonbinary people? Cause, I know things are far from equal between women and men but at least most people Acknowledge that women exist. (Not trying to start an argument or anything, just wondering?).
In terms of worrying people don’t think LGBTQ+ people need support now that we can get married! I get that! Tegan, as you have said time and time again, marriage equality is the FIRST STEP, not the last. When I came out to one of my grandparents as genderfluid they asked me ‘can you get married?’ And I said yes, but in truth, where I live in Australia there are only two options to have on your birth certificate m or f no x, meaning you can’t change your gender marker to be x. Having said that, you can only change from f to m or visa versa if you get some kind of surgery or hormones. That’s not equality. And in terms of the attacks happening all over the world, I’ve seen on yours and Sara’s social media the stuff happening near you. And a few months ago there was a bill someone in the government tried to get passed that meant that religious schools could kick trans kids out of their schools if they wanted to. Everything is far from fucking equal!
Thank you to you and Sara though, for starting the foundation and trying to make the world more equal.
Phoenix, he/they/ri/it, 15, Australia
Tegan, if I were asking for donations and you winked at me, I'd GIVE YOU my credit card AND my social security number. Kidding. Kind of. Honestly though, congratulations on the TSF milestone! Hearing the hard work and contributions quantified, even as a reader, feels satisfying and exciting. I'm constantly in awe of how you and Sara accomplish every goal you set and the responsibility you take in doing so. I really hope you guys write a tell on the logistics of running a foundation and band some day. I went down a rabbit hole of 501(c)(3) revenue tax laws and for profit affiliation and have soooo many questions. Also, is the round up an option on the T&S Official Merch page? Should I call Donna?
My neck is sore from nodding so much.
There are places I avoid now because they always have solicitors at the door. I’ll often enter through the exit or vice versa, depending on where they are stationed, just to avoid them. Or I’ll hover and time it so that I’m walking just behind someone else and use them as a buffer. I just don’t have it in me to say no, and I often don’t want to donate. Rarely because I don’t believe in the cause, but I recently discovered that many charities mismanage their funds (intentionally or not) to the point that some of them are pretty unethical. And that’s why I also stopped donating at the till. I like to do my research before I donate. For this reason, I no longer judge anyone who says no (and boy did I used to. Like, ‘you can’t spare a measly dollar for hungry kids, asshole?’ silently screamed at the patron in front of me in line). Everyone has their reasons, and we should always be curious, not judgemental.
Btw, I definitely would have smelled a scam too, if an organization ‘required’ my credit card info over the phone. Especially since they never left a voicemail. Seems a weird tactic. If they’d left a message you would have called back, I’m sure. It is unusual, so I think you should forgive yourself for that one 💚
I find it awkward when people ask me for money too, like if I don't do it I'm a bad person, but I try to remember that I help and give other ways to causes I care about. I donate monthly to the Tegan and Sara Foundation, I volunteer and foster cats for the Toronto Humane Society, I don't have a car so I feel like I contribute for the environment, idk, I don't have a lot of money either so I do what I can with what I have.
I left my retail job recently because the amount of pressure put on us to sell perfumes and aftershave’s to every customer was awful. Nothing we did was ever good enough, going to work became soul destroying.
When I make the calendars each year, 100% of every toony donated for one is donated to the Tegan and Sara Foundation. I remeber when I gave the check at the Vancouver Con X show. I wanted to give it to you in private and not make a scene as I didn’t want fans to think I was showing off. Jill told me to come up to the front when you started to talk about the TSF because she said you would love it! To say I was shitting myself is an understatement. (The money was part of my inheritance from losing my parents. My mum had told me to donate some of it to an organisation that meant a lot to me so who better than the TSF) I try amd give to local organisations when I can e.g. Pippa’s Army the rescue place we adopted Mo from, Thurrock Mind for mental health. I get so anxious when I see all the clipboards.
Fun fact: We get them knocking on the door as well, did you ever get that? The worst one was when Evamgelical Christians came to the door when I was at work and asked for me by name. When Charlie asked them why they wanted me they replied “we want to invite her to come to us so we can pray over her and wash away her sinful ways!” Like What the actual fuck!
Is it Tiny Kittens HQ? I know they're in Langley, BC so maybe not. But definitely check out their Youtube. (Will this let me link? https://www.youtube.com/c/TinyKittens/videos or /c/TinyKittens/videos if that doesn't work.) They have 24/7 livestreams to watch the cats and kittens they TNR/rescue.
Also, thank you so much for your foundation! It IS available on AmazonSmile, re: the big box store donations, and sometimes PayPal offers to donate with purchases. As much as it may feel like you haven't done enough, you have definitely done so much. I'm in Chicago and I know a local group got funding from you, which is always needed and appreciated. Like you've said, every dollar matters and helps.
That said, I could not imagine giving my credit card info to a random person on the street. I've signed some lists just asking for names, but credit card/bank info is just too much without further security. Even over the phone like you said, that's just not guaranteed. Too much adulting to think about. I said it before: Adulting is hard lol
I always have my Tegan and Sara Foundation tote bag every time I go to the store and love when I get compliments for you and the foundation!!!! 🥰
Great post and discussion!
I also resent being made to feel guilty by others, I'm quite capable of being hard on myself if I think I need to do something different!
I do sympathise with any charities trying to raise extra funds, it can't be easy but begging on the streets, cold calling door to door (always at an inconvenient time!), etc is so indiscriminate that it makes caring people feel guilty and uncaring people, rude!
I try to support several charities regularly so that the money I can afford to give is donated purposefully rather than reacting to the most persistent canvasser!
I do find it hard to walk past homeless/desparate people begging on the street, especially if I'm going to the supermarket. I often ask if i can buy food for them - many not all! - are grateful.
I suppose altruistically, truly selfless giving should cost us something? Going without something in order to give to others, rather than giving what we can spare anyway? Maybe that's a whole different discussion!
Also, giving to others is more than just donating money. Sometimes that's easier than giving up time and energy to help. My mum always says, you can usually find the tme/money to do what you REALLY want to do.
Anyway, keep giving Tegan, in all the different ways that you and Sara already do to help and inspire so many people in different ways. Thanks and please come to the UK!
Tegan, I have so many feelings from this post because I really understand the awkwardness and challenges you describe about asking for money as someone who works/volunteers in the not-for-profits (nfp) sector. The reality is fundraising is a core source of income for nfp and no matter how much we try to diversify our sources of income, we rely on communities to keep us going. I personally love a good peer-to-peer fundraiser where you involve friends/family and multiply your impact.
You have no choice but to develop thicker skin if you're in the nfp space but something even harder is unlearning the shame society drills into us about asking for help. I try and reframe asking for money as an invitation for others to contribute to a cause they likely already care about (maybe you already do this?). It's a chance for them to connect and have conversations about difficult topics. People are extremely busy and it's a tough time for everyone, so prompting them to share resources/wealth is ok but nobody should be guilt tripped into giving. Side note - clipboard/street style fundraising often feels disingenuous/overly aggressive because street solicitors can be contracted so they may not even work for the organisation OR they receive commissions based on the number of signups so...be wary
Hey Tegan I’m in the same boat. I don’t pay enough attention, that I move too fast, that I miss things -> that right there seems to be me sometimes. You say make the change while you wait for your change. How do you know when that’s happened and when will it happen. Seems like waiting is beating me to death. And that credit card thing. Yep. Mines expired and can’t find the new one 🤣. And donations. God I hate asking customers if they would like to donate. We can ask but everyone is struggling, I even had one guest tell me that she just wants to come shop for groceries without having us ask her more money and demanded I tell the manager. But it comes to a time that we all must help each other out right? Thank you both. Love ya!